LIFE STORY : CHAPTER 2

Chapter 2

EMOTIONAL REMINISCENCE
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The sun was about to set and it was still pouring heavily. But the fight between the clouds above and tears inside her was over as she gave up the battle by stopping her tears to fall more. She looked around, then looked straight and took the first firm step forward.

Yatin was no longer there to drop her back home, Yatin was no longer there to remind her if her phone was fully charged or not. It was getting dark and it was for the first time in the last 5 years that she was walking back home all alone. May be, this was the first step to face life on her own. She took out her phone and after checking the battery she started looking around for a taxi.

Luckily, she could see the same taxi driver standing outside.

"Can you drop me back home if you are not waiting for someone else"

"Yes, madam ji why not and I won't mind getting another tip from you and I will make sure I take you back from the shortest route possible"

Samaira was silent and without speaking anything more she quietly got inside the taxi. She completely ignored the extra tip request as she was no longer in a hurry. Her world had changed completely in the last few hours.

"Madam ji, I have put on the same FM channel with the old movie songs which you had requested while coming here"

Samaira was still silent and didn't respond, while she could hear her favourite romantic songs being played; she leaned herself on the back seat and was busy looking outside. Every moment from the last 5 years started flashing in front of her eyes. She was still wishing if all that had happened in her favourite restaurant was just a bad dream. In no time she realised that all that happened wasn't a dream and she had to prepare herself to face this tough time.

"Could you please change this channel and if we can hear some news"

"Sure Madam ji"

Nothing had changed in the world outside, some politicians were still making similar stupid comments as they always used to; and it again reminded her how she along with Yatin used to laugh insanely whenever they used to read or hear about these stupid so called political leaders.

"Could you please switch off this if it doesn't causes any problems for you"

"No problems madam ji"

In spite of the deafening silence inside the taxi, her mind was still not at peace. She tried to take a nap and closed her eyes, but it was of no use. Finally she opened her purse and took out the letter which Yatin had written to her long back. It was one of the sweetest romantic letter and one of her most priced possession.

Be whatever happened she always kept this letter safe in her purse. She could forget everything including her makeup kit but this letter was always with her. She started reading it once again and went back in her dreamy world remembering all the nice and happy moments she had spent with Yatin.

She was still in her dream world, while she heard something

"Madam ji we are back at your home and I am happy I was able to take you back in the least possible time"

She paid the fare and also gave the extra tip as though she was altogether in a different mood but she could see that the taxi driver had been very cooperative all through the way.

"Madam ji it's fine, I think there wasn't too much traffic so I will take this extra tip some other day"

She took back the extra money as she also wasn't too eager to insist him. She rushed back home and she could see her father standing on the balcony waiting for her.

It was her mom who opened the door as always.

"Good Samaira you have come, we all have been waiting for you for dinner. You know your dad gets so much worried and he has been standing in the balcony for last one hour"

"I am so sorry mom, but I had my meal outside and I am so tired that I will straight away go to sleep, I am sorry I couldn't call you as I was attending office calls all through the way back"

She never wanted her parents to get slightest of the hint of what she had gone through this evening.

"What happened to your project which you have been working for so long. Hope it was liked and appreciated" Her dad enquired about the online portal. He didn't have the details but he definitely knew that she had spent lots of sleepless nights on the online portal in the last few months.

Normally she would hug her dad everyday while coming back from work and used to discuss at length her day's activities. But today she never wanted to face anyone and simply walked towards her room.

"Yes dad, it was fantastic and it was appreciated very well" she spoke while controlling her tears and quickly walked towards her room and closed the door in a hurry.

"Something is definitely wrong and I need to spend some time with her now"

"I think you are unnecessarily getting worried, she looks tired and I think we should let her sleep"

"No there is something wrong, she has never gone to her room without hugging me, can you get me her dinner and I will talk to her now"

This is the beauty of a father-daughter relationship where silence is understood well and even silence speaks volumes.

"Sure, do you want me to join you"

"No it's fine, I think I can manage"

It wasn't that her mom couldn't feel the pain in her sweet daughters eyes, after all she was the one who had given her birth but she wanted her dad not to worry much and all she planned was to talk to her late night when everyone in the house was sleeping. Midnight talks was a regular feature for her and both mother-daughter would speak endless till wee hours in the morning.

Same side, Samaira's mom had lots of faith in her husband and knew that he will handle this situation well.

"Samaira, can I come in"

"Sure dad, please" she opened the door and rushed back to her bed.

"So how was your day, seems it was quite hectic"

"Oh yes dad, it was damn hectic. Anyway, you tell, how was it for you. Hope you didn't get too much bored with mom's kitty party stories" she laughed as she never wanted her dad to feel her pain.

"Samaira, I am your father and I can clearly see that you are trying to hide something, do you want to share anything if you feel comfortable"

"Oh dad, seriously you are thinking too much, you know I am a grown up girl and I can handle tough situations" she smiled.

"Ok, this means there is some tough situation"

She again smiled as she didn't knew what to speak.

"Samaira, listen to me very carefully. Break-up's do happen and we have to face them"

She was shocked to hear this as she thought she was successful in hiding things from her dad.

"There is nothing like it dad"

"You don't need to speak every bit Samaira, I could see something is badly wrong when I saw you coming back all alone in a taxi"

"Nothing like it dad" she went silent as she tried her best to control her tears.

"Samaira, tell me one thing, I understand everyone needs a partner or a soulmate but is it only with females, don't males also need someone to walk alongside them? Is it always a case that a female needs a masculine protection, is it true that a female can't do things on her own, is it impossible that a female can't remember her bits on her own. Basically it feels nice when someone reminds you, it's a happy feeling when someone cares for you and then you slowly develop a habit of being dependable because you know that there is someone who will also take care of the gaps. All this is very normal and all this nowhere means that a female is weak or can't manage her own bits."

He kept on speaking as Samaira was listening to the best speaker and her role model. It seemed as if her dad has read everything like a magician.

"Do you remember when you first went on stage and won the best speech award? Do you remember when you were the only one in your entire batch to get a seat in the most prestigious college?"

"Samaira, I have grown you up as an independent and a brave girl. Even your mom has sacrificed a lot only for you and she has seen her own dreams in you. I have put you in many difficult situations in the past; which you had successfully passed single handedly. You have made our family proud many times."

"I know dad"

"Samaira, never have any complaints from life, I can tell you that life puts us in many difficult situations but we should never give up. We should always face these tough situations from front. I and your mom have complete faith in you and I know if life has closed one door for you, it will very soon open another one for you. Have some patience, I know it won't be easy but I am also sure that life has in store something even better for you"

"And remember someone who is meant to be in your life will always remain there and those who are selfish will always move away once there demands are met."

"Thank you so much dad, you are undoubtedly the best dad in the world" she hugged him tightly and couldn't control her tears.

These words from her dad gave her the much needed strength and gave her the confidence to face the world.

"I know I am the best and even your mom is the best mother otherwise it isn't easy for everyone to stand outside the door for so long and secretly listen to our talks" he laughed while looking at the closed door.

"Come in, I know you are there" he again laughed

As she stepped inside, they all started laughing madly and hugged each other.

Next morning was different for Samaira, she woke up early as she had always been an early riser and her friends used to tease her of being insomniac. She never bothered as she always took less sleep as one of her key strengths, though she knew this was not good for her health.

Till date, she had been rising early as she wanted to pass the first good morning wishes to Yatin, she always tried to wake before him and ensured that she sends a sweet good morning mail to him. But today's morning was different, she still had the nice motivating words from her father very fresh.

She had earlier plans to take a day off as she had some other plans but after last nights chat she was all charged up and was ready to face the enquiring world. She knew she will be having lots of questions to face but she was determined to answer all of them.

She got ready and dressed herself in her favourite dress. It wasn't easy as her dad had said, she was still not able to completely forget the sweet memories from the past. For the first time she took out the letter from her purse and placed it under the clothes in her cupboard.

She reached office on time.

"Good Morning Mam, we thought you were on leave today"

She smiled and walked past towards her cabin.

On her way towards her cabin, she could see the staring eyes but she tried to ignore them and walked confidently. As she was settling her bits, she could see

 

To be continued......

LIFE STORY : CHAPTER 1

Chapter 1

STEPPING BACK OR STEPPING FORWARD
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She has been waiting for this day, for last many days she was trying to meet him but somehow things weren’t in her favour. She was very excited to share her last few month's efforts with him.

His words were still so fresh in her ears, "Samaira, I think if I can get my own online portal I am sure it will help me reach masses but somehow it's not happening for me". He went silent after speaking that, and as always she understood that he wanted her to work on his dream and do something for it.

It wasn't difficult for her to read what he wanted, she knew she can easily do it for him, she also knew he won't accept it as a favour but she had a way. Same day she decided that she will give him a surprise very soon.

This is how two loving hearts understand each other without even speaking a word. When you love someone from the bottom of your heart you can easily read between the lines, you can read the silence, you can read the emotions, you can read the eye movements.

And today she was so excited to share the first cut of his online portal with her love.

"Can you please try to divert some other way, I need to reach fast" she almost screamed at the taxi driver while looking at her watch.

"Sorry madam ji, you know this traffic is bad at times but don't worry I will get you there soon"

Her eyes were still at her watch and she was getting restless. She was too eager to see his reaction when he would have a look at what she has been working for last few months.

Finally while stepping out of the taxi, she gave extra tip and just rushed to their favourite restaurant.

As always, she could see Pramod serving customers.

"Pramod, I hope you have my table reserved"

"Mam, yes I kept the same table reserved and have also asked the chef to get the onion rings ready, should I get them served or as always, will you wait for Sir to join you"

"Well you need not ask, you know it very well, thanks for the onion rings but get them on the table once he is here" she smiled

"Sure mam"

"Is this power socket working Pramod, I would need it for at least next couple of hours"

"Yes it is and don't worry, as always this table is reserved for you both. You are the star couple of our restaurant and you both make a very sweet pair"

She blushed a bit, simply smiled and felt happy, she has heard such compliments from many and all she could do was to thank her destiny which made them meet. She had never expected that she could be so lucky.

"How can I do this again" she murmured while trying to find her makeup kit in the purse. As always, she had left it again at home.

Glass pane across the table worked as a perfect mirror for her. She wanted to look her best and expected him to look only and only at her. It was her possessiveness, well yes at times over possessiveness, but she was happy that in spite of some little clashes here and there, they both were still together. She was happy that he has always loved her the way she was and the best part was that he never wanted her to change in any sense. May be he loved her stupidities and the possessiveness as well.

She again looked outside the glass pane and it was a pleasant monsoon evening, she closed her eyes and in her dreams was holding his hand and walking in the rains.

While looking at the pearl rain drops pouring on the glass pane, she instantly planned late evening celebrations with him in the rain, off course after she was done with her plans of showing the online portal. She knew he will abide by her wishes as he has always done in the past without questioning a bit.

"Hi"

"Oh you are here, I didn't realize, I got so indulged in the rain outside. Isn't it amazing weather today? Hope you didn't get wet, luckily I reached before it started raining. It's still drizzling so good you reached before it gets heavy. You know I have so much to talk to you and I can understand you must have been so busy for last few days. But no worries I will make sure you don't leave today before you hear everything from me and I have something to show you. You better sit and just listen to me"

She flurried her questions and opened her chatter box while laughing and giggling and started opening the online portal.

She was about to turn her laptop towards him.

"Samaira, can't you understand that I have been ignoring you from the last few weeks"

It was shocker of a statement for her as she had never expected this. She had a feeling that she was being ignored but always tried to console herself with one or the other reason. Her fingers got numb and she slowly moved the half turned laptop back towards herself.

She was silent as she could sense more was coming her way.

"I feel suffocated now and many times you simply cross the line with your over possessiveness"

She was quiet and was wondering when in their last 5 years of relationship this "line" came in between. She always had a feeling that their relationship had reached to a stage where they could openly discuss and take mutual decisions. However what she was hearing was a single sided decision.

"You get rattled on whatever I do, seems you don't wish for my happiness, seems you want that I should only stick to you, seems you want that I shouldn't talk to anyone else except you. I feel I am restricted to share my happiness, I feel I am restricted to share my opinions, I feel I am being stopped from reaching out to the masses"

"Hmmm, so what do you want now" she spoke in the softest tone but with a very heavy heart

"Well Samaira, I have told this many times to you in the past but it's clear that you don't want to change. You constantly keep on repeating the same behavior every time"

"Well I don't think I am that bad but still I am eager to know what you have decided now" this probably was her last defense statement

"I think it's high time, we should step back"

"How many steps back" while asking this, she was still waiting for a miracle answer but it was too late.

"Samaira, I have never in the last 5 years made you feel guilty on anything and have never stopped you from living your life. I have always given you lots of freedom and personal space and have never forced myself on you. I have always allowed the breathing space. But you on the contrary, have made me feel guilty many times as if I have done something wrong for our relationship, as if I have neglected you whereas I know that in spite of all the troubles at my end I have done the best I could do. You have always ruled the terms and I have abided by them. I can recount on many instances as old as 4 years back where you have made me feel guilty. Now I feel our relationship is at that stage where we cannot handle this or solve this anymore. So let's take steps back, let's take steps back to reach the stage where we were 5 years back. Let's take steps back so that we can live our lives peacefully at our end. And you are not at all a bad person Samaira, you are a very nice person and I always pray and will always pray for your health, happiness and success"

What an irony of life it was, on one side of the table she was being blamed for acting as a road blocker and an obstacle; On the other side of the table, she was looking at her screen which had the portal to allow a more wider access to his work and dreams.

"Yatin, thanks for the wishes and clearing my confusion on your behavior for last few days. It's more clear to me now. I can feel from what you have spoken that you have gone through lots of pain and sufferings in the last 5 years. Spot on, sufferings should end for you. I strongly think and I am confident that you no longer need my wishes; you are free to chase your dreams, my dear"

As Yatin walked towards the exit, Samaira looked around, nothing had changed around her.

She could still see people having their chats while enjoying their food. She could still see couples around her and it was still drizzling outside. Rain drops were still falling on the glass panes in the same fashion.

But there was something missing and it was something big. She could feel the pain and the huge gap, she no longer had the desire to look at her face in the mirror. She looked at the onion rings and she just started eating them one by one.

While she was still having her first plate, she ordered one more.

She wanted to take out her frustration and anger on the onion rings. She kept on gobbling them without worrying much about the taste.

The charging point was still working and she kept staring at the online portal home screen.

Her mind was blank and in no time she hurriedly packed her things back. Settled the bills and she quietly moved outside.

She stood in silence in the rain and wanted to hide her tears in the middle of the small droplets which were falling directly on her face. She was suggested to step back but her feet weren't moving. She looked back at the restaurant and vowed never to step back again. She knew it won't be easy for her from here but she was her family's pride, she was her father's brave girl. Her mother had lived her own dreams in her, she herself had her own dreams which she never wanted to kill.

The world had always called her a dreamer and it was time to turn those dreams into reality.

To make those dreams come true, rather than stepping back she decided to step forward. It was a heavy day for her but it was an end leading to a fresh beginning. But one thing was very clear that she will definitely miss Yatin.

To be continued.......